Silence Kills, Speak Up

Silence can be deceptive. Speak up, you may never get a chance to say what you wanted to.

Evening Life is Back !

1 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

It had been more than 2 months that I had not seen dusk...and I had not seen the twilight...
evening for me had been a dream. We used to get into the office building in d morning and getout of it in the late night. It was after so long time that I got a chance to move around in the evening under the open sky....many thoughts flashed through the mind...right from the school days of playing cricket in the evening was a must followed by the memories of my engg college days when we all friends would sit at the OAT or the stairs of the D-Block and have a cool time with the wind blowing swiftly making the environment come alive. Today after so many days here at kolkata i could feel the same breeze and the brisk touch of it.

It was just amazing to feel the breeze and have my head watch the high flying aeroplane shining in the slanting sun light high above. It was an amazing sight to watch after long time. The best thing was that I was completely out of any tension and was so very cool and light...

If that was yesterday then today too wasn't too bad evening. There were moments to cherish and close them in the heart. It must become a habit to come down to the ground floor and sit just on the road divider with the friends and have a few lighter moments and feel the cool of the evening. Evening is such an amazing time which makes the heart fly with the birds flying back home.The twilight falling into the eyes makes everything look so colorful and beautiful. Friends have got closer by now and the compatibility level has definitely been increasing day by day. I wish this continues as long as possible. I wish we have such small moments daily in our lives to make our stay in Tech Mahindra more beautiful. Life no doubt has got lot easier and more promising. Just a wish that all goes well !!

God bless all !

कुछ चटपटी यादें

2 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

वोह जाती है टोह जाने दे
वोह जाती है टोह जाने दे
तुझे प्यार से मतलब है
कहीं से भी आने दे

कितनी आयी कितनी गयी
कितनी आयी कितनी गयी
मगर प्यार न बदला
बस लडकियां बदलती रहीं

यह मेरी कहानी यह मेरी ज़िन्देगानी
यह मेरी कहानी यह मेरी ज़िन्देगानी
आगे का मुझे याद नहीं

दूर से देखा तोह बारिश हो रही थी
दूर से देखा तोह बारिश हो रही थी
पास गया तोह भीग गया

दूर से देखा तोह शेर था
दूर से देखा तोह शेर था
इसलिये पास नहीं गया

यह मेरी कहानी यह मेरी ज़िन्देगानी
यह मेरी कहानी यह मेरी ज़िन्देगानी
न वोह मानी न वोह जानी
बस बह गए मेरे आँखों से पानी

तेरी याद मैं रो रो के हम tub भर दिए
तेरी याद मैं रो रो के हम tub भर दिए
वोह आये और नहा के चल दिए

उसने कहा तुम्हारे पास दिल नहीं है
उसने कहा तुम्हारे पास दिल नहीं है
अपने दिल मैं झांक के देखो ओ जालिम
तुम्हारे पास दो दो हैं

वोह आयी और खुशबु बिखेर के चली गयी
वोह आयी और खुशबु बिखेर के चली गयी
और हम हैं के सूंघते रह गए

The Above were few of the shayari which made the moment light at the end of the ITP session. Dull was the class and all was so different when it all started and it was a very good moment when we all had loads of fun and the best part was this all was made instantly in the classroom with the help of nishanto. I wish there were few more days at ITP training. Well we still have the behavioral training left but don't know how it would be after all the results were out. The retests and their results are yet to finalize many things for the future. I hope everything goes fine and the people who have to appear retests clear all of the papers and join us for the next level of training. I wish everything goes fine.

All the best to all of them !


1 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

The first day seems to be so far from now.Its all past now and gone into the pages of history.But it would never fade away from the memory of all the ITPians for their rest of the life.

As I moved into the class only one thing that I identified was only me and me. All unknown faces around made me feel lost in the crowd. It was all very exciting though !

Days passed by and the programmer seemed to be so long and never ending. But today we have reached the end of it and I can definitely say that life of each one of us has taken a drastic turn. Twists and turns make it appear so interesting but going through all that was never easy.

Few faces that weren't familiar enough have now left impression for lifetime. Few voices which were never heard would always keep ringing and the ears would wait desparately to hear from them which isn't quite possible in the future. 30 students and one class, not all known to me but yes they are now some part of life. Recreating this life is never possible again.

Working together for two months was never a long period to know everyone perfectly. but was not too short enough to capture them in the heart !!

There won't be those fights with the person who came up as a big surprise like a gust of wind loud and clear banging into the ears. I was taken by surprise and instantly we went along to be known for our mischievious arguments and leg pulling. Enjoying all that was really a good experience to carry along to the future.

At this point when i sit in the class (supposedly the last formal day of technical training) how can I forget those coffee breaks and lunch breaks. Those were the peak hours of masti and enjoyment. Back to days where we worked long hours in the night. Quite a different experience with lots of interaction with people with whom I would have never known without working long. Sundays and saturndays being weekends never stopped us from coming to office. Thinking of those days, I just cherish those moments of enthrwall and frolick.

Few great friends coming up to make a good bond for the future were never far off in being close to heart. Mention of those names would not be a fault in any case -
Vinay, Chetan, Sutapa, Premjit, Manish, Bijeta, Swagatika, Afsana, Sana, Jyoti, Tanushri, Priya, Sandeep, Tintin, Rudra, Suman, Nishant and Sumit.
All these people would be there in the heart and mind even though we would move ahead in different directions and may not get next chance to be together again.

ITP might end, but life hasn't ended yet with high hopes and quite a lot of emotions attached with this event. Waiting to get another chance to be with one of them. Wit crossed fingers(not for peace tough ;) ) , I wish everyone get through and makes it big in their own way.

Three cheers ....for ITP !!

Aisi Aankhein Nahin Dekhi

0 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Aisi aankhein nahin dekhi
Aisa kajal nahin dekha
Aisa jalwa nahin dekha
Aisa chehra nahin dekha

Jab yeh daman hawa de
Aag jungle main laga de
Jab yeh sehraon main jaye
Ret main phool khilaye

Aisi duniya nahin dekhi
Aisa manjar nahin dekha
Aisa aalam nahin dekha
Aisa dilbar nahin dekha

Uske kangan ka khanakna
Jaise bulbul ka chehakna
Uski paajeb ki cham cham
Jaise barsaat ka mausam

Aisa sawan nahin dekha
Aisi baaris nahin dekhi
Aisi rim jhim nahin dekhi
Aisi khwahish nahin dekhi

Uski bebak si baatein
Jaise sardi ki ho raatein
Uff yeh tanhayi yeh masti
Jaise toofan main kasti

Meethi koyal si hai boli
Jaisi geeton ki rangoli
Surkh gaalon pe pasina
Jaise babul ka mahina

Aisi aankhein nahin dekhi
Aisa kajal nahin dekha
Aisa jalwa nahin dekha
Aisa chehra nahin dekha

Crossed Fingers

2 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Crossed Fingers – Not of any importance to anyone other than me. It may represent something else to others. But for me it’s Peace. Peace against fight, Peace for fun, Well I don’t know what it means and what I am up to out here. But yeah, I want those crossed fingers to open up and keep me on the firing line. Been ages; I have been on peace. Peace for all sounds so good. So satisfactory! Peace should prevail. But not of this kind within me. Though this is peace for some, but I am fighting yet another war within. War of minds., war of egos, war of thoughts. This fight with crossed fingers does not look good neither does it feel great. Open finger fights are any day better.

I just can’t keep myself in peace anymore. The fingers are still crossed and I feel like I am dead. These fingers have remained crossed and would remain crossed. No other option of having the opportunity to open my fingers and start fighting. Noting exists anymore!!

Being in peace for is similar to be dead. I want to start living. Start afresh someday and live my life with open fingers. Crossed fingers hurt.

I want to live again…
I want to live again…

I want to live.

I am not Dead

Kyun TUM

0 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Kyun mujhe kuch yaad aa rahi hai,
Kyun mujhe tumhari who lipte hue julphen yaad aati hain
Kyun tumhari aankhon ki harkatein mujhe satati hain

Kyun tumhari un aankhon ka intezaar hai jaise
Ke ek baar aaj unhe main chu lun apne aankhon se
Ke aaj tumhari aankhon main kahin kho jaun main

Woh jhuki si palkein kuch keh rahi ho jaise
Kyun mere dil main ek awaaz gunj rahi hai aise
Aisi aankhein nahin dekhi jo mujhe apne se alag kar rahi ho jaise
Lekin kyun aaj khudko khone ka gam nahin hai mujhe

Aisa kya hai jo mujhe tumhari who baatein yaad aati hain
Kabhi aisa toh nahin hua tha ke tumhari yaad aane ki zaroorat thi is dil ko
Toh fir kyun aaj mera dil tumhari aankhon se baat kar raha hai

Mujhe pata hai ke un aankhon main nami hai kahin
Lekin kyun who mujhse nazarein churati hain…

Hai in aankhon ko tumhari zaroorat,
Tumhare hoton ki hai mujhe intezaar
Ke tumhari hoton ki thar tharati aahat ko main mehsoos karun

Tumhari unglian hain khilte kamal ke pankh jaisi
Kyun mera mann aaj unhe thamne ko hai bekarar
Tumhari bikhre hue latayen,
galon ko chum rahi ho jaisi shararat ki hai khayal unhe

Aaj mera mann hai bekarar kuch kehne ko tumhare kaano main
Bas hai yeh ek khayal meri

lekin kyun mera dil kehta hai…
kyun mera dil….kehta hai…
kyun tum itni yaad aati ho..
kyun mujhe kuch yaad aa rahi hai…

Sound of Soil

2 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Tanmay Bose !!
The name is sufficient for anyone who has witnessed him ever.
When I heard about his concert at Swabhoomi, I was not that sure about his talent or about his aura. But anything related to classical music and of the sort has always fascinated me. There have been times in the past when I have been quite inclined towards it. Classical music has the perfect blend to make your nerves get electrified. This was proved by Tanmay Bose.
A perfect ambiance to start with. Perfectly located with the open air waiting to be blown away by his concert. Never during the whole concert did I feel that it was a classical concert. Perfect blending of east and the west. The best part was the way the instruments that we generally find in a rock show giving support to the classical music. It was as if the instruments were in their best form.
One thing that touched deep into my heart was "Music is not entertainment...its dedication and focus which brings about this magic".
The other thing that was quite amazing was that classical music can be so rocking which I had never realized before. Unbelievably I found myself banging head to the jugalbandi of Tabla, Mrudang and Pasa(not sure what it is called). The jugalbandi was a great display of musical talent in the whole troop. Tanmay Bose was again superb in creating magic with tabla. The co-ordination was something to be looked at. It almost blew myself out with appreciation and surprise as well.
The music was so original and to the base of being classical that it could justify the name of the whole concert. As if sounds were coming from the five elements with which our world is made up off. Its often said that classical music can create fire and make rain. And now i realize that's not impossible. Quite possible. The other side of classical music is that it brings about so much of happiness and balance to the soul that it erased pain and calms you down to the lowest level of energy with positivity flowing within like a current. People generally comment classical music to be boring and slow but this display made me realize how wrong we had been. It was no less than a rock show which makes you dance to the music. I had my legs and hands moving and for a moment I had the feeling of standing up and dancing to the tunes and the beats.
Another item was east vs west. The eastern packed instruments and the western modern drums and co...For a moment i got confused whether the vocalist was trying to present the sound of the instruments or the instruments were singing like a human. It was really tough to distinguish which was which. All sounds were similar and synchronous that it gave a perfect feel to the ears. With all this it was crystal clear to distinguish the sound of each and every instrument being played. It also turned out to be a jugabandi towards the end and was really amazing to find the vocalist competing with the sounds of the instruments. Just perfect !!
There was a moment when tabla's echoing sound was perfectly caught by the vocalist in his rhyming tone. Just amazing is all I can say.
Thanks to Sutapa for giving this opportunity to experience this event of lifetime. My faith in classical music has been more strengthened by this concert and my belief in our own culture has been rooted deep within me. Our heritage and culture goes long back which the western music can never catch up with and I bet had there been any linking park or britney spears, they would have failed to create the magic that Tanmay Bose could create. They could not have even stood beside him and try and make a jugalbandi. Forgot to mention about the bass being produced by the guitarist. It was even more than any professional rocker from the west with the best of the best electrical/electronic guitar.If you love banging head to rock music then you should have definitely experienced today's concert. It had all in it to make it a PERFECT show.
Hats off to Tanmay Bose and his team for creating the magic and thanks to Sutapa for this great evening.
Thanks to Her once again.

Way back to School Days

3 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Songs from the yesteryear sometimes knock my head and just bring down everything just like a flash.
Heard to the songs of Mann after long time and suddenly many things flooded in. Last year at School is what i want to get back to. Heard to khushiyan aur gum for the first time at Chicku's home. Those evenings at her place would always be some of the best days. Remembering everything is so great. Feels like i am at her place having chit chats and waiting for sir to come. Those winter chilling evening when i used to go with dad to her place were never aware of where i would be after seven long years. Its just like yesterday. The study table, the text books, the chair, the TV in drawing room, aunty's hand made food, the idli,the dosa,the vada,Sipun's cycle,the Sofa,the gate to her home, the verhanda are so much familiar to me that i sometimes feel like going back and sit there and study my 10th once more. Knowing everything to be impossible and being practical is so different.
One of the most important things which we used to discuss during those days was whether we would be in contact after school or not. But somehow we have managed doing so in a great way. A single call to Chicku right after the song made me quite happy that we have made the impossible possible. Being in touch and remaining the same way as we were wasn't that easy but we have made it. Discussing everything that we did after seven years gives the satisfaction that we have lived each and every moment just so perfectly. Those walks to the tuition and coming back in the late evening and then finally waiting at her home for dad to pick me up are so fresh. So very cute.
Life has taken both of us in different paths and there is this situation where we are not aware of each others' life but still whenever we get in touch we are the same old friends. Talking to her is the same.
The second thing discussed during school days was about my first love. But it no more exists and i am finally out of it all. Chicku used to be so bothered when will i forget everything and move ahead to make a career of my own. And now I am well set and made my career. Cant say that i have made it big but all i can say that i have come a long way from where i was. Never ever in my dreams did i imagine that I would be writing this down even after seven years and i would be remembering everything so well. But that's what is the case.
These songs may not mean anything to others but they carry a lot of value in form of my memories. The first time i heard to that song and how it had touched me so much. Everything makes me nostalgic but again i am happy. A smile is the last thing that i can avoid while thinking of that. After all childhood is the best time in one's life.

I Still blv dat relationships Decay

2 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Few months back I had posted something on Decaying of relationships.After that post there had been many discussions with different people and somewhere deep within i had felt that my thoughts were contradicting my own beliefs.
But circumstances do make me feel once again that i was correct with my belief. I can still reiterate my words and say that yes relationships decay.
Lost faith on strangers !
Why do i trust strangers so early ? Why do i keep repeating my own mistakes ? Why dont i realise the truths of the world ? why do i expect so much from others and finally why do i bother for others when they hardly care or realize?????????
questions whose answers i don't need to know. I know what i am and what can be one can change me or the way i think and in the process i have been hurt quite often just because i trust them so much. But everyone in this world was a stranger when we walked in to the world but we made relationships and it was trust and faith which has been the ingredients of all these. Right from having faith in the person whom we didn't know and then slowly calling her mom , we have trusted each and everyone who has come across us. Still I have not been the best in taking decisions regarding people. Well that's my weakness. I sometimes need to open my eyes before i move ahead with my trust. But again why do people play with it when they know that someone cares ?
It was never friendship and I thought that I lost a Friend !
Talked to Jimmy on AIR....had been really impressed with DIL SE and had been eager to talk to him. I just wanted to let him know that he has been doing a fabulous job. But I definitely wanted him to connect me to one of those persons whom I wanted to say sorry...but then it was too late (2.30am)and i didn't want that person to find another reason to be angry with me. But it was really good to talk to Jimmy and find a few good thoughts. The best thing that he said was "Be Yourself" and that has really boosted me up in being what I am.
Talking to him, I have somehow got this feeling of being an RJ. Its really interesting job. While talking to Jimmy I could feel the background sound and the environment. I just got this idea of trying hand at that too...but i need time to nurture this dream and who knows some day I land up doing what I always wanted to. All on destiny though....
Pune or not ???
Puzzle solved...I would definitely try to go to Pune...Make all the efforts to get transferred to Pune...had been thinking over this since long and finally today i felt that i should make this move. The place which i had been loving initially has suddenly made me quite uncomfortable. Few unwanted events and I find no enthusiasm in staying back. The most important reason that I have found the environment to be cool no more exists. There always exists some disturbance within. Not capable of coping with it I would choose to opt out of Kolkata. Venture into the new life at Pune. I hope I get my posting at Pune. But now, all depends on my PSG Head and I have my fingers crossed for the time to come.
Fingers crossed somehow mean something else to me. It means ....anyways will come to that in some other post.
Plans are made to be changed. Had planned to go to B'lore in Puja vacation to meet all friends.Even plans of mumbai and Pune from there was all set...but these all vanished like a Monday blue...cant take leave since my training would not have been over by then...that's ridiculous...damn training...what wud happen to the plans ?
what about my friends ?
wen will i meet them ?
Been quite nostalgic off late...those pics which had been locked in the DVD were opened and parsed through to let the memories come in and make it rain....was quite happy though...coz i was going to B'lore to meet all of them. But then all crashed and now its all in the dust and no plans as of now....
Pathetic life...

What was it ?

0 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

A day with nothing new with few different incidents that keep changing life on the long run. Definitely things occurring on a single day won't be that big but they sum up over a period of time in deciding the future course of anything...that was for something not that big an issue but definitely a heated one which kept me under my own skin for the whole of the day...but the late evening was something different.

What was that I felt ? well cant be explained was meeting that i had been planning since days which was fruitful finally and it was was so peaceful...perfectly the way i had thought off...setting off from office from 7.40pm i was quite sure it would be a successful and great meeting...well for those thinking it to be an official meeting, please note that it isnt anything professional...its completely personal...
but i felt real peace at heart and mind...i could say that i could feel God and every step and action of mine was as if controlled my Him. till I got back there was that power which stayed with me.May be it goes everywhere with me but its not quite obvious but definitely when I remember Him i find his blessings along with me...thats what makes me have my faith intact...elated to a different level of happiness and pious state I can sense nothing good for my current doings...have i gone on the wrong lane ?
should i come back before its too late ?
these are few questions that remain...

Miss You Dear

0 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

I miss you when something really good happens, because you are the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you are the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry because i know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you most when i lay awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with each other;for those were some of the best times of my life


0 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

The Namesake !!
This word is self explanatory. The book was a great piece of work. Not to forget the movie either. The movie very well portrays the true picture of 1970s depicting the difference in social life at India and at US. Well I wont get into the movie and the review but the reason why I thought of writing about this is that this movie has quite a few resemblances to my life as well. though not in exact sense but definitely the way the love of parents has been worked upon gives the sense of reality.
There was a scene in the movie where Irfan(dad) takes his son Gogol(in childhood) to the sea shore and then to the dead end whr the stones meet the sea. The way Irfan has gone through the scene and the emotions that were pouring through the whole sequence I could nt stop imagining my child hood. It was for the first time that I realized what family means to me. Being far away from home I had never ever missed home and i was comfortably living my life except missing bhubaneswar and my friends. But when it came to my own family it was never missed cause being i always took it for granted. Anyone who has watched the movie would definitely feel wat i amd talking about. The perfect story to open ones eyes. Currently Dad,Mom,Sis and me all are at four different places and quite similar to the movie and I being Gogol though not in complete sense. But yeah I definitely hardly bothered abt my family.
This movie touched so much deep into my heart that my thoughts have changed and for the first time i missed my family a lot and wished if i could get into my childhood once again start living those beautiful moments once again. each and every moment of childhood flash before my eyes as if it was a movie running in front of my eyes.
It was 17thAugust night which I would hardly forget in my whole lifetime.
Frankly speaking I had never sent a miss u sms or a card to dad or mom or sis, but it was on this night that i sent miss u message to all three of them and I know they too realized how deeply I missed them because i did something which i never did earlier.All i can say is that the movie shows how the Russian Author Gogol changed the life of Irfan but here Irfan has definitely brought about a change in me. There is no doubt about it.
Namesake is a must watch for someone who wants to realize what family means and what children mean to their parents. What the parents undergo in bringing up their children and how its too late wen in fact we start realizing.
Lots of changes have come in these few days and that's why I have said earlier in my blog that i have seen life so much in these days which i have never seen in my lifetime.
May this change come for the GOOD !

Man's Proposal at the hands of God's Disposal

0 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Man proposes and GOD disposes. This is what I have always believed.

This philosophy is what has made me survive till now.
Before coming to Kolkata I had always been happpy regarding one thing. It was Satru's presence which had made me take my posting at kolkata to be a positive signal. May be it was god's plan to bring both of us together to work towards our dreams. But when I reached here at Kolkata I hardly had any time to visit his place and have some good quality time being spent. And the worst thing that could occur to our plans was that Satru got transferred to BBSR last month itself.

Earlier it was always planned and discussed that we two would get together and some real big projects would be undertaken. We could easily meet each other on weekends and be thr once i settle down.

It was yesterday that i was completely free and down with emotions. I was damn condused. thr was noone at my place and I wished if Satru had been there with me. May be i needed him the most at that point of time and this was the tragedy that we both are not at the same place. It was after many months when I realised his absence. Few confusions that raised in my mind would have been solved immediately once we had met but that was never been the case. And at this point i would like to share a secret.

If anyone has any thing to search for and solve his problem on the internet then there is Google and anyone wishing to solve his problem in life there is Jubul !!

well jubul is none other than Satrujeet. Thats what is all about him. I wish he was here with me at kolkata, then these problems and confusions would have never bothered me.


1 broke the Silence...wen wud U?

Huh !!

Its been long time that I have been with myself. Getting back to own form and trying to be urself is so good. It was at bbsr dat I had visited blogspot and written something. There have been frequent visits to my own profile but I have nt found the right time to get along and sit for my own thoughts to get the priority.

Supposedly it was the last time when I was quite nostalgic about my leaving bbsr. More than a month and I am through loads of things in life. Seems like I have seen a lot in this one month, even more than what I would have seen in my whole lifetime. And believe it or not, I have seen life close enough in these few days.

Its not happening yaar…don’t know whr to start from and where to end. One month is such a long time that there are many things which just need to be mentioned. But again this one month passed so quickly that it seems to be just like a flash.

But yeah, I can get along and make a move now. Kolkata was not that great as expected. Few of my previous blogs have gone regarding Kolkata and how this city of joy had proved itself. But suddenly as I reached this time to start my new life, Kolkata was no more a city of joy. The 1st week at kolkata was a nightmare for me. May be it was just a testing period which I had to survive in. And I survived ! Lots of struggle and pulling around to settle down and begin life from the scratch at kolkata. Time flew by and blogging was always on my mind. But access to the resources and thoughts was prohibited by time.

The beginning on the BIG day ! 27th July 2007, I joined Tech Mahindra. This was just the beginning and everything went fine and it was then that I had a feeling of getting finally settled and starting life afresh. Few resolutions and responsibilities at the back of the mind made it a steady start. ITP(Initial Training Program) as they say Began from 30 July and we were introduced to our colleagues and the new life. But slowly in just a week I could sense the burden of life. What exactly we were upto. Life revolved round Tech Mahindra. Anything and everything was related to the company. The feeling of being tied down crept in. There was nothing left in life except going to office early morning and coming back late evening. In the meantime, I had made good friendship with my room mates and that was the only thing that could make me survive.
First module test and it was all so different from college. Life rolled on and in no time now I am completely adjusted to this new life. The schedule makes me no more tired. The day I return at around 6.30pm it seems so different. Its always better to stay down at office till 10pm and work hard and have the feeling of satisfaction and come back home to find only the bed waiting most eagerly.

In the process 31st August made another mark in each and everyone’s life. Don’t know about others but definitely this day means a lot since my first salary was credited to my account. And the feeling of being grown up was superb. Though I could not find time on this day to get to the ATM to check my balance, still I believe it holds great importance to me. 1st September 2007 my first withdrawal and then loads of shopping and purchasing.

Well things have changed so much in just a few days that I hardly believe my own self. Just a month back I was never sure if I would make good friends out here and have any sort of life after college. Even for few days after joining I had no idea about what is in store for me. Ticking clock has taken the charge and now we are at not far from the day when out training would get over. Just 20days from now our ITP would be over. But never in my wildest dreams did I think that I would miss ITP and ITPians so much. The thought of the end has made me think twice about it. I have suddenly started loving my office environment, my work load, the stress, the people around and most importantly the group of people I have been around since a month. Though one month was never a big time to know them but definitely there has been some attachment for them. As I know myself very well this is not a new thing. But still this attachment word has started a new turmoil within me. Many things have touched me. Professional and personal life need to be kept different. But what exactly do I mean by the both and where should I draw a line?
Does it mean that I can’t be personal to my colleagues? Why do I think it to be so?
Why do I have to think about it so much? Don’t people working in office make friends? How far these people keep this friendship? I sometimes get to hear “this is no college!! And we are colleagues….not friends….”
This makes me quite apprehensive regarding my own way of dealing with people around me. The fear of missing ITP has made me do something which I have never done.

Detachment is the key to happiness.
Therefore not being attached to anything or anyone is only solution. People have taken this step differently and believe I have gone nuts and just trying to be professional. But I know what I am doing and what is correct from me at this stage. But there exists some attachment at this point and I need to overcome that. Now the most important question for me is to give an option for Pune center or not. Before coming to Kolkata I always had in mind that I would be opting for Pune once my ITP ends. But now after this one month of stay at kolkata I am in two minds. Practically speaking pune would be better since it gives more of options being the headquarters. But logically speaking I am already settled at this place and it’s been really tough to get down to this state. Settling at Kolkata was never an easy task. And now that I have finally got kind of lifestyle and a good friend circle(rather colleagues which some would like me to address) I don’t have that mental strength to go through all that once again which occurred to me when I came to Kolkata. Well I would have to leave some day and dats the way life in IT industry is. But I don’t want this to happen so early when I am quite satisfied with my current life and the way it’s rolling on. Staying down at kolkata would also have few other advantages which are out of the scope of this platform. But in all sense I am confused. Damn confused and rambling mind is eager to find a way out. Thinking of all this makes me wonder how could life change so fast and take different twists and turns in just a month.
Life is kicking !!