An open letter to my future life partner

Dearest Future Life Partner,

In the times when majority of the people of this generation are either heart broken or are afraid of being broken, I might sound old school. But I want you to know about four things that I believe would make our relationship work for a lifetime.

1. Understanding each other and the perspectives that we bring into our lives. Understanding of the situations that both of us are in and understanding what we are in reality. Understanding what our inner truth is and being there for each other when we need the most. Understanding that even if we fight we will still be together at the end of the day. Understanding the emotions that we will share for lifetime. Understanding that we will be there for each other no matter what.

2. Respect for each other's individuality & dignity. Respect for each other's space & privacy, respect for each other's beliefs, respect for each other's family & friends, respect for each other's choices & likes or dislikes. Respect for each other's careers along with respect for each other as we are. Respect for each other without being judged.

3. Trust that we will stand by for each other no matter what. Trust that we will vow to believe in each other and move together for each one's growth and well being. Trust that we wouldn't ever feel the need to break away from each other. Trust that we will be there together forever and beyond.

4. Love that will keep us bonded for always and forever not because it's love but because we understand, respect and trust each other with our lives. That we will fight back from the lows in our relationship for the only reason being the love for each other. Love that will require not to be said but felt.

Yours truly forever
Future life partner

Moving On...

Life Moves On! How surprising it may sound but life truly moves on.

One and half years!! :) Well of course, things don't seem to move. Been through lots of things but few things keep coming back - Your true Self! Circumstances!! All that changes is one's approach to each one of them. One learns more about self and the way one should behave.

Look around and think of the time gone by, you would realise how things have gone through metamorphosis and how life has given a chance to live it again! It may not always be lilies and roses but the fragrance does exist. Go around the park and explore the world. It's not always thrones!

I have my Sunflower, check what you get :)

Good Luck!

Abhi

Figments of Imagination or Reflections of Reality

Sometimes I wonder what is a creation. Is it just the result of imagination or the reflection of something which we see in reality?

off late I have been doing only two things -


1. My regular job at work
2. Reading books


Reading books has got into me for sometime now. Surfing the net, checking mails, chatting, talking over phone and even watching TV have bored me to the limits. And when I'm talking about reading let me be specific with it. It has only been few love stories now, but probably I would shift my gears soon to something different. But for now its love stories which have hit me like a wave of the sea. Yet to complete the books in my to read list.


I am simply awed by the books that I have read recently. I would prefer not to compare them to each other in any way because every piece is a result of the author's creation. And when it's creation of someone I have no right to compare when God even fails to compare among its creations.


Completed reading


'I too had a love story' by Ravinder Singh (yes for the second time of course). I had the same feeling after I finished with the book. However, I enjoyed reading it second time because I had known the ending and the whole tale earlier when I read, so perhaps I could relate to each and everything in a better way.


'A walk to remember' by Nicholas Spark was the next in the slot and though I had watched the movie in my first year engg ie long back, I still could connect to the whole of it. No where did I feel like I have already watched the movie, why do I need to read it any more. Books are better expressive than movies. I strongly feel that now.


'Dear john' again by Nicholas Spark, was the third book I have ever read from a single author other than Chetan Bhagat and I must admit I've become a big fan of Nicholas now. The next thing on the list is to go through all of his writings. Will surely get it completed soon. This book specifically moved me with the simplicity of it's writing and the portrayal of its characters. They are real to the core. Must read for our generation.


'A thing beyond forever...' by Novoneel Chakraborty came as a strong recommendation from one of the co-readers. Looked for the book the same day and completed reading it today. Not much of an effort though but it did give me a sleepless night after I stopped reading the 3rd section keeping the 4th for the next day i.e. today. Believe me I couldn't accept the fact that it ended. I wanted more from it and perhaps didn't want it to end. The best feature of this book is not the story, but the philosophy regarding life, love and God. All three of them so well gelled together that you could never escape anyone of it in your lifetime. Truly a master piece it does take you back to your school days and the early days of your adolescence.


After putting down these books in my shelf I would never dare to compare any of these to each other. And about losing these at any cost is not possible. So please be careful if you ever borrow them from me. Don't forget to return because I'm never gonna forget that you were the one who...


Lol! A feeling that sometimes always stays and you may have lost once or hundredth time... but it stays - Love

Commitment in LOVE

Okay, guys! I know not many readers follow this blog, but the very fact that I love blogging and getting down to write what goes through my mind here I am with my new blog. My last blog had come long back in July which is more than 6 months from now. I suddenly realised that the total number of posts for the year 2009 has come down to a single digit. A statistical data would reflect that it has been an exponentially decreasing graph perfect for research like the falling sensex. You can surely have a complete analysis on different trends of posts and all that mathematical calculations. So, if it continues it might soon touch the zero point. Thus an attempt to get back to this world of mine. Blogging has always been an amazing thing to do. But of course writing anything and everything doesn't make any sense. So I had been off for this quite an obvious reason.

Moving on with the fresh beginning, I would wish everyone a very Happy Valentine Day to all. Lets celebrate this day just for the sake of love but not for any form of it. It should always be taken as a reason to celebrate love. Do we really give ourselves the time and chance to let our near and dear ones know that how much we love them? May be you could use this as a medium to let others know how you feel about them. It's of course the right day to do so! Hence, do find out some time, and luckily today being a Sunday, you can't even complain for not having time! Go ahead if you haven't done it yet.

Of all the things that occurred to me during these more than six months duration I would surely consider few things which changed the way I perceive things around me. One of them being the word Love. I have always believed that it's love that makes everything worthwhile. No doubt about it though. But when we come to the point of commitment in love, I believe I had failed to understand what it was. It isn't about just the literal meaning of it. Quite a controversial thing to say and I know many may come up with different versions of the word 'commitment in love'. As I now understand this in a clearer way, I can say that it is about accepting one and everything about the person and his/her world. It's not the only person you commit to. You need to commit to the whole world around her (from now her would mean both he/she). Accepting doesn't always mean that you need to compromise. If you compromise then its not commitment in love. Its just an adjustment, and life doesn't run by making adjustments. You need to feel it internally. You need to prioritise how strongly you feel to take everything along with her in your life. Just having her to spend your life with isn't sufficient. It's also about how she takes your world with you. There needs to be a reciprocation of this event. I may love someone from the depth of my heart, but what I too need to know is how much I love her family and friends. I need to get everything right by knowing the same about her as well. That's when you say it as perfect couple bonded in love. I have had experiences of people around who keep continuing in a relationship just because they love each other or should I say they feel they love each other. But on the contrary I would often rather more than often find having differences, fights and arguments over the silliest of the things in the world. That is due to the fact that you have not yet started loving the world around her. As simple as that. And however you try, you end up some day walking in your own direction when the situation or should I say burden is too heavy to be over headed. Thus commitment and love are two different things which need to be looked at very carefully. I would define ‘commitment in love’ as companionship. How well you can give company to the one you love till the eternal without making any adjustments or compromises is the key to success of it.

I too had a love story by Ravinder Singh book review

It had been long time that I had read a good book and nothing better than "I too had a love story" by Ravinder Singh to make that long wait end. This was a book which came across me as a surprise. Though I had never heard about this book, but my quest to read a book made me purchase this one thanks to the price being only 80 INR. Jokes apart the quote on the book "Not everyone in this world has the fate to cherish the fullest form of love. Some are born, just to experience the abbreviation of it" made me feel like going through the love story which seemed to be true.

"I too had a love story" is a true love story. It's about Ravin's life and his much loved beloved Khushi. Being a true one it has the simple, common things which every one of us can relate to. Full credit goes to Ravinder for creating the magic through his words. It would have never been an easy task to pen down one's own story when you have lived it. One would not know what to put in and what not in a very nut shell making it interesting at the same time. That makes the book beautiful. The way Ravinder has carved the characters, the situations and specifically the conversations are worth noticing. His narration is very much like a conversation and one would feel him telling the story face to face. The biggest thing that the book has is the conversations between the two partners. You would die to keep on reading the conversations just because you too would have had such small talks in this new age of technology. It's not a classical love story of the old days, but it's a story of the twenty first century with the strong base of Indian values.

Everyone who has loved or knows what love is all about would love to read the book and those who have not felt it in their heart and are yet to experience what love is, they would also not be disappointed. Ravinder himself being a person from the field of IT working in a renowned IT company instantly connects to the readers from the industry specifically. Generally considered to be naïve and non romantic that a software engineer can as well have emotions and feel like any normal person rather than being a techno-savvy gimmick is what meets the expectations from the young budding writer's attempt.

This is a story about a software engineer who lands up in a matrimonial site named Shaadi.com and happens to get the love of his life. The love that they both share over the long distance by the help of the gadgets and technology proves that love over the internet, social networking sites and phone is not a new thing for this generation. It can be natural and very much practical given the sincerity among the partners. Further, it also brings to the fore the life which the young graduate software engineers lead. Their aspirations, their expectations from life and from their relationships for which they find very less time thanks to the overly demanding professional life has been subtly put in though this is not the theme or objective of the book. But it definitely is the undercurrent. This book shows how the two people go along with their love story and how it turns into a tragic end but nevertheless that life needs to move on and it's not always the end to life.

Though quite predictable, the story is well carved out and very much tightly intact. It keeps you well connected. It doesnt let you keep it down and take a break. This is a book worth reading and can also be gifted to your loved one. One of the classics in this genre and I suppose very much close in comparison to "Love Story" by Erich Segal. It's already a national bestseller.

You can buy this book only for only Rs.80 from the official website http://ravindersinghonline.com/.
Don't forget to read the reader's comments and what media says.

Happy reading and hope you find to know the true meaning of love which is tough to find in this materialistic world.

The Void Within

Begin the journey towards love, in order to fill your internal void.

Emptiness makes you feel as if you are hollow on the inside. I recently asked a friend, “how are you feeling?” and he replied, “I feel like I am rattling around over the face of the earth.” This response overflows with a feeling of being lost and alone or the ‘empty’ feeling.

It speaks of experiencing yourself as having no sense of belonging or purpose. If you ask yourself the question: “how am I feeling right now?” and the answer is “empty” or “numb,” for no apparent reason, it is a sure sign of being disconnected from yourself or blocking off from your own feelings.

This suggests that you are either repressing deep pain or fear or maybe you have experienced a pattern of being neglected, probably from an early age. I have often facilitated quiet meditations with people to help them to make contact with their deep inner core and often they will say “I feel nothing.”

Neglect or trauma in our past can make us hide away our precious souls that we don’t even know how to begin to connect with our sacred inner selves. Being separate from yourself is the ultimate loneliness. We are neglected as children if our needs and wants are continually not heard and we are left to our own devices.

One of the most important self development processes is deficient in this type of upbringing: that of validation. The journey of understanding, trusting and responding to your feelings, begins when your early caretakers regard and direct your myriad of emotions in a loving way.

This validation process empowers you to makes sense of your unique needs, wants and responses to the world and in this way you begin the journey of knowing who you really are on the inside. As an adult we self validate ourselves by continually confirming who we are through our words, actions and life decisions. We also self validate by finally accepting ourselves with all our shortcomings.

Don’t keep running away from yourself. Problems will arise if you simply focus on filling the void. We devour volumes of self-help books or study psychology. We even take the empty feeling literally, as being hunger and we binge on food, cigarettes, take drugs and generally put whatever we can into our mouths.

Keeping yourself busy is another way to dull the experience of yourself. Unfortunately, at the end of every busy patch there’s always a lull and then ‘empty’ returns with a sick familiarity. It must be said that it is invigorating and vital to do exciting things, you just need to locate your intentions. If you are doing all because of a need to run away from yourself it is an impossible task.

The more lasting solution to filling the void is to begin to have a relationship with yourself that is meaningful and enjoyable enough to sustain you through the empty moments. It is important to consider how social conditioning has made an impact on your direction and choices in your life. For instance, we have been taught that being selfish is wrong and that taking care of others and sacrificing our own wants and needs is real giving.

On top of this our ego driven model of living then coaches us to believe that we can only be fulfilled if we are young, attractive, thin and have loads of all the right things. The end result is that we feed our self esteem from the outside first. In other words we focus on others needs and on what others think or say about us; we strive to have the most stylish career, the most chic clothes, the most envied relationship, the apartment with all the trimmings and so on.

This can be termed the weak ego. Believing that we will find the answer to self-fulfilment and happiness from acquiring more or doing more. Social conditioning has brought us up in a way that actually diminishes real self-knowledge and grounded self-esteem. Your search for happiness is really your yearning for your own self.

The biggest test of how you really value yourself is when you imagine being stripped of everything and then ask the question: can I still respect, accept, trust and nurture myself? Can you feel connected to your beautiful life force within which feels solid and fluid at the same time. This takes enormous courage. Be still with yourself and allow yourself to contemplate who you really are, on the inside. Learn to meditate or pray; Begin a validation journal and start to record thoughts and feelings once a day.

Practice focusing on the here and now as often as you can. Remind yourself that you really only have this moment. Stop worrying about the future and rehashing the past. Make a commitment to yourself to protect and treasure your life force energy, everyday, in a positive and gentle way. Only through practicing acceptance can you begin to change. Open yourself to love by softening your heart. Recognise the beauty and wonder in the world and in others. The most healing way to fill your internal void is to begin the journey towards love.

Kyun TUM

Kyun mujhe kuch yaad aa rahi hai,
Kyun mujhe tumhari who lipte hue julphen yaad aati hain
Kyun tumhari aankhon ki harkatein mujhe satati hain

Kyun tumhari un aankhon ka intezaar hai jaise
Ke ek baar aaj unhe main chu lun apne aankhon se
Ke aaj tumhari aankhon main kahin kho jaun main

Woh jhuki si palkein kuch keh rahi ho jaise
Kyun mere dil main ek awaaz gunj rahi hai aise
Aisi aankhein nahin dekhi jo mujhe apne se alag kar rahi ho jaise
Lekin kyun aaj khudko khone ka gam nahin hai mujhe

Aisa kya hai jo mujhe tumhari who baatein yaad aati hain
Kabhi aisa toh nahin hua tha ke tumhari yaad aane ki zaroorat thi is dil ko
Toh fir kyun aaj mera dil tumhari aankhon se baat kar raha hai

Mujhe pata hai ke un aankhon main nami hai kahin
Lekin kyun who mujhse nazarein churati hain…

Hai in aankhon ko tumhari zaroorat,
Tumhare hoton ki hai mujhe intezaar
Ke tumhari hoton ki thar tharati aahat ko main mehsoos karun

Tumhari unglian hain khilte kamal ke pankh jaisi
Kyun mera mann aaj unhe thamne ko hai bekarar
Tumhari bikhre hue latayen,
galon ko chum rahi ho jaisi shararat ki hai khayal unhe

Aaj mera mann hai bekarar kuch kehne ko tumhare kaano main
Bas hai yeh ek khayal meri

lekin kyun mera dil kehta hai…
kyun mera dil….kehta hai…
kyun tum itni yaad aati ho..
kyun mujhe kuch yaad aa rahi hai…

Miss You Dear

I miss you when something really good happens, because you are the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you are the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry because i know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you most when i lay awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with each other;for those were some of the best times of my life

Last Night At Heaven

What should go in someone's mind when he knows he is to leave heaven ???

What should be going on my mind ?

Finally the time has come which I had been waiting for since months...but not always this wait was out of excitement...many a times it was just the fact dat I would be leaving...having spent seven golden years of my life at this place which at the beginning was hell to me, has become my heaven.I know from now on coming back to bhubaneswar wont be the same as it used to be while i stayed here.Things have changed so rapidly.Nothing is left at this place for me.All my friends have left. When I come back wat i wud have is only my emotions and memories of this place. Each road and place at bbsr wud strike me with hundreds of emotions simultaneously, some sweet n some sour...but all would be so good when i come back.

Looking back I have got many things from this place...got some life long relationships and some life long memories. Bhubaneswar was never a place od my liking. I never wanted to come and stay here leaving my school and my place. But having come here and spent these years, I feel these years were not flown by time. It was quite steady process. I dont think time flew by but yeah time gave me everything that I aspired for. Had known that I would be leaving bbsr in 2007 since four years. But never visualized this day.But finally the day has come.I can see everything going around me.Busy with my packing I have nt got the time to think over this moment.But now when all set and I am waiting for only few hours from now, i can feel the bubbles in my stomach. The thought of leaving bbsr doesnt bother me much dan the thought of going to a new place.

Kolkata wud definitely be a a strange city and also a new beginning for my life. Life wont be the same hereafter. For the first time while talking to Dad I could feel the sense of urgency in getting responsible more than what I am now. Dad was really in a different frame of mind which is normally not the way I have seen him since my childhood. There were few words which were uttered and I just took and realized that dad was afraid of losing me. Few of such thoughts rambled around me too. Freedom is no doubt what I had aspired for. But now i feel responsibility comes with freedom.So i need to get more responsible. Now exposed to the whole world I can feel that till now I was under a safety cover of my family. The cover which was like the shield which protected me from all evil. Like a bird protects its children till they are ready to fly, every parent does the same. And today the time has come when the bird is ready to fly but still very afraid to be lost in the large sky which no more provides the protective shield. I wish I could always have dis shield along with me. But That would never be the case from now. Home is home and no better place to home. Mom's food and care and concern (which always appeared to be like intervention into my life) would be missed and I would wait with longing thoughts to come back HOME.

At these last hours i m blank without any thoughts,any feelings, not happy not sad. Just wanna be flown away by life the way it wants me to go. But yeah getting back the same life that I have had at bbsr would be impossible. Even when i come back to settle down here at my heaven it wont be the same like now. Life would have changed then. With fingers crossed I leave.

Babbye Bhubaneswar.
MISS U A LOT and the years that u gave me to live were the sunniest moments of my life.

Bye

LOVE YOU

Tujhse Naraz Nahin Zindegi - Lyrics

This was the song i had been listening to for the last four hours!still feel like listening it more n more.

Each part so well made dat i hardly can write anything more today....just listen to it.Awesome !!

tujhse naraz nahin zindegi
hairan hun main, ho hairan hun main
tere masoom sawalon se
pareshan hun main, ho pareshaan hun main(2)

jeene ke liye socha hi nahin
dard sambhalane honge(2)
muskuraen toh muskurane ke
karz utarne honge
muskuraon kabhi toh lagta hai
jaise hoton pe karz rakha hai

tujhse naraz nahin zindegi
hairan hun main, ho hairan hun main

zindegi tere gam ne hame
ristey naye samjhaye(2)
mile jo hame
dhoop main mile
choan ke thande saaye

tujhse naraz nahin zindegi
hairan hun main, ho hairan hun main

aaj agar bhar aayi hain
boonde baras jayengi(2)
kal kya pata inke liye
aankhein taras jayengi
jane kab gum hua kahan khoya
ek aansoon chupa ke rakha tha

tujhse naraz nahin hai zindegi
hairan hun main, ho hairan hun main
tere masoom sawalon se pareshan hun main
ho parshan hun main
parshan hun main parshan hun main

Click away to download the two versions....one by Lata n The other by Anup Ghoshal.

Both of dem cud do justice to the song.

http://as01.coolgoose.com/music/song.php?id=271409

http://as01.coolgoose.com/music/song.php?id=271414

Ja Rahe Ho Agar......

This is a song sung by Ganesh Hegde.Nice sweet melodious but the best part of it is the lyrics and i feel it was written just for me.I dont know who the lyricist is but i owe him a lot for creating this master piece.I know many people have not heard this song but this one is something awesome.The best part is

"tumne mangi dua...ham ko mile har khushi
tumhi meri khushi...phir kyun mile na hame"

Song of pain and the circumstances.The different way to love someone.A person never wants to lose his love but how tuff is it to ask ur love to never return back ?Thats what has really touched me and i feel the same for the person i waited for more dan 10 years.I dont want her to return coz things have changed and by that i dont mean dat my love has changed or i dont love her but just that i dont want to get hurt once more.Let her be there in my dreams,in my prayers and in my past.Let Her be there where she is now.....

Jaa rahe ho agar
door mujhse sanam


phir mere pas ana nahin
yeh bhi mumkin nahin
main palat na sakun


isliye itna wadaa karo
mujhko aawaz dena nahin
mujhko aawaz dena nahin


mil bhi jayein agar
ham tumhe rahon main


pher lena nazar....par mila na nahin
dekh lo bhi agar tum hame bhul se
apni ankhon main tum...ashk lana na nahin


dil se hamko to tum kar chuke ho juda


ankh se... bhi... girana nahin
ankh se bhi girana nahin


tumne mangi dua...ham ko mile har khushi
tumhi meri khushi...phir kyun mile na hame


tumne li hai kasam gam na karna kabhi
tum sikha do jara...muskurana hame


tum ne keh toh diya yaad karna nahin
khwab main.....tum bhi aaana nahin


ja rahe ho agar
door mujhse sanam


phir mere pas ana nahin
yeh bhi mumkin nahin
main palat na sakun


isliye itna wadaa karo
mujhko aawaz dena nahin
mujhko aawaz dena nahin