Silence Kills, Speak Up

Silence can be deceptive. Speak up, you may never get a chance to say what you wanted to.

What more can I ask for ?

19th August had been a special day from last three years.

Three years back this day had only one reason for being important because we had our first day in engg career on 20th of august and therefore 19th was the d most exciting one.But never thought dat this day wud be of great importance and memorable enough for its the B'Day of one of my great friends - sweet Swati.

The day was made more special by the Bday treat of another friend named was her bday treat and i had a great time there.But was sorry dat cudnt remain there till the party got over since i had to move to Puri for the surprise visit for Swati.

The most controversial plan was a success!!Finally i could balance both the engagements.Had fun out there.But was tuff on my part for the last few days on deciding what to do.Was in a complete confusion and restelessness of the heart.Had to make a decision so as to be with both the persons as they mean a lot in my life.But why is it dat we alwaz have to confront such situations in life ?

Why is it dat god tests our commitment level n our dedication all the time ?

is it dat we alwaz need to prove ourselves ???

cant we do away with it ?

Anyways what more cud anyone ask for in a single was an awesome day with loads of happening people around.First the Party at May Fair till 12.50...den a drive of 60kms on bike with a very charming companion....light rain n rain coats on....on a mission...wonderful on full speed of 90 to 95kms/hr.....less traffic on the highway due to the drizzle n the road was superb with the lush green fields and the road side silence with the tall standing trees with their new green branches reaching out to the road from both the sides....seemed just as a tunnel through the trees.....hardly there was any one except me and my thoughts....was really too thoughful throughout the way n was wondering how the beauties of the nature are left alone with no one to appreciate the ultimate beauty....

It was too nice to have such a trip on bike tht too for such a long distance with all enthusiasm to give a surprise to Swati...She didnt knw dat i was it was all fun....Himanshu was in complete form....was riding the bike like an we reacheed our destination in an hour....dat was really cool...

The time was now for meeting all friends at Puri who had already reached the place earlier in d day.We all had been planning to visit Puri together for many days....but it cudnt materialise before.But it was d Day....all seemed to be in great mood with the intension to blast away with fun.....

Had a great time at the beech....the rain had stopped by den as if only for us to enjoy the great overcast conditions.Things turned out to be real fun with all sorts of games being played on the beech which brought back the memories of the childhood when we used to play such stupid games of chor n police,chain chain ,truth n dare(silly dares to bring a smile),etc.....Den was the time to pull everyone into the water on water.For the first time i took a bath in the sea.It was like water water everywhere.Water running down the head through the eyes n den ending up nowhere as if they had been there just for the moment.Quite temporary....hoped it went on to the feet so as to feel it go down with a purpose.Purpose to make me feel,feel wht i have never felt before,to keep that feeling for ever with me and the feeling of being me.Sand bombs kept on hitting me from all friends.The waves could sense the delight in the environment and grew in size and force.Sometimes quite unstable n unable to control balance as i hoped to lose control,I fell on my knees with the pull of the retreating water as if it was me not able to acccept their retreat.Den waited for it to get to me once more.And at the stroke of this thought wht i find is another dancing wave waving like a happy flag of independence marched towards me....we loved it and the waves played on and on with the minds of us.Then their were the bday wishes and the bday songs right inside the sea with water everywhere around us.Has there been a better bday celebration ever ?No i suppose....It was awesome to find all those lovely faces smiling like a small baby with never ending excitement.I hoped that these faces alwaz bear that innocent childlike smile forever.Then the childish act of writing names in the sand , waiting den for a long wave to come and take all dose wishes to be fulfilled.As if the wish has been granted and the hopeful eyes waitin for the wish to be fulfilled.

Moment hard to forget;being with friends with no hesitation to do any damn sort of thing.Friends and friends only.Forgot all the sorrows and the the hardships of life.The truth dat we r left only with few months to b together.heart went on to reach the complete satisfaction and to accumulate the memories and the events which wud make all of us overwhelmed with happiness when this day wud again arrive next year to find dat we all r no where near.....all in their respective jobs working hard to survive.A chill runs down the spine at this thought of separation n tranquility.But i know these moments wud be as green as ever and wud alwaz bring a smile on the face with that twinkling droplet in d eyes.Tuff to accept n hard to believe!Sigh!!

Such was the fun and the excitement dat we even skipped our lunch and we all kept ourselves busy as if this was the final day.It hardly mattered how hectic and tiring the day had been.We werent ready to leave the dreamland but the time came to depart from our dreams.That was it.enuff was the call and we came off the shore.To the parking slot where the all alone cake had been waiting for its massacre for its purpose of existence;to fill heart happiness in everyones heart,for the song to play on and all cheers to come for the BDAY gal.But there was no knife.How to cut it ?

Then came the engg mind.A square piece of packing cartoon of the cake was wade teh knife and the claps,the song and the wishes went on.But one thought:the cake gets itself cut for someone's happiness.It has done its job.We being the best on the face of the earth still are nt sure wht exactly our job is.Well dats another part of discussion.

The time had come to say adiue...twinkling eyes and the glowing faces gave the indication dat we wud come again n have another such plan.waving hands got out of sight when a deep sigh came in me with that feeling of satisfaction.But again the mind was busy thinking:is it reeally possible to come back again for such a trip?is it that easy enuff to come here ?is it fate or we which decides such plans?

Definitely not we....its HE n only He who has the plans set for us.May be we can still make it for another occassion...dats the hope burning in me but i hope dat hope does nt die deep within me....Then there was the feeling of losing everything in d very last minute.I knew i was missing all dat i had with me.Could realise that i had been trying to hold the sand within my fingers.Dont knw why but felt to get out of all my senses.To be free in the open air.Truely speaking for the first time felt the need for a bottle of alcohol...may it be wine or beer.But i wanted to be out of my sense to speak up everything to myself which i cudnt.To see all d dreams dat i was afraid to see.To wave at the sky.To go mad at the world.To vent all my anger which makes me afraid to lose many people around.But really i want to speak up.Speak up wht i want to.How long can i live with it?Live with a falacy.I m nt myself.But again its my sense and my inner soul prevented me from havin alcohol..but i wish i cud...if given a chance and freedom to do so i wud try n see wht r the things which i wud do which i really never think of.

Well den we had been to the temple of Shree Jagannath.Had a beautiful darshan and as dey say if u r destined to have a view den only u have dat.N its really true dat if ur destiny has it u will definitely have a chance to come to Puri...else u may long to come but u wont really make it to the place as it had been d case many times with me.

Finally we(Himanshu n I) too left Puri with a bigggg sigh dat the aim to have a trip to Puri is accomplished.A dream come true for me.The road was bit busy since it had stopped raining bt we reached safely home.

Now i feel what more can anyone ask for on a single day?Is it not enough?why is it dat i wish i cud again get back to the memory lane.well memories are the lanes through which we often pass by but hardly realise the value of it until we meet the time....the people who r part of d same memory lane...

I know this is all crap.What has been written above is all crap.Just typing along.sorry if wasted ur time....but i knw it only matters to if u read it completely den u must have wasted ur time....n if u feel u havent wasted den i hope u felt wat i did....

0 broke the Silence...wen wud U?: (+add yours?)