Silence Kills, Speak Up

Silence can be deceptive. Speak up, you may never get a chance to say what you wanted to.

Blogging and orkutting have been a part of life. Never knew this until the exams started.
Though the exams were on I still could not resist myself from orkutting n blogging. To some extent blogging was under control but orkutting was like irresistible. I know this shud nt be the case. But yes I have been closely attached with orkut. When the time had been tuff during the recent days n months it was orkut which really helped me in facing the tuff times. It was because orkut has given me some great friends with whom I have been closely attached to. Yes they stood by me when I needed them the most. I have nt met any of dem as of now bt I knw it would nt have been anything diff had we met.
I have created a completely different world of mine on the net. There are people who like me and there are people who fume when they see me. But at the end of the day this virtual world has been better for me dan the real world. Its true that on net we tend to mix with people more easily, but is it that we understand each other better because we write down our emotions ?
When the world is going techno crazy with voice chat, video conference, voip etc I feel, its best when we write down something than when we speak or have face to face communication. People would argue that the best form of communication is through body language. But are we all dat proficient enough to convey our thoughts through body language? Do we really make ourselves clear through this form of communication? Lets see it from another angle…suppose we convey the right way but is it compulsory that the other person interprets it rightly ? It may not be the case always…people are nt that good at interpreting things.
Sorry to deviate from the topic…but keeping the above argument in view I feel that I have been able to create this virtual world my own way. May be the way I wanted it to be. I have been understood beautifully. May be I have met like minded people who understand me better coz they think like me. My current friends may argue that its really not possible to make great friends on net. But I can bet they (net frnds) r nt less than any other friend whom I have met. Many may comment that its my frustration level which has made me connected to net n search for better friends. It may seem dat I have become crazy about net….many may comment that I m an internet freak. But why the hell shud they have a problem with this ? I give a damn to what people say. No doubt I have n had great friends before. But yes this change of environment has also been very pleasant.

Now to blogging. Why the hell should I blog ? Why do I waste time out here ? What benefit do I get ? Why not write a personal diary rather than blog ? Who will read these long texts? Who has that much time? Who r the people u want to read this? There are many such questions that have come up from different people n friends at different times. I myself don’t know the reasons clearly. I need not justify what I do. Its just that I liked the concept of blogging n so I m here.And all dose “WHYs” really don’t matter. One thing that I can say is that blogs make me analyse myself n my world better. And why nt diary rather than blog is something which I too don’t know. I have my own readers and I m happy that its thr on net. Hardly matters who reads n who doesn’t.

But sometimes I too feel. Is it that I have lost faith in my friends. Is it that I have lost confidence to face the world for which I m feeling better being behind the screen n den interacting with people. All I can say is that its definitely better n easier to talk to strangers. Its easy enough to study others with their kind of approach. Its really easy to share all that u feel with a stranger dan doing it with someone close enough. Generally we start making friends n den we share all dat we feel. But here in case of internet its just the reverse. On net we feel free to share our emotions even when we r strangers. Then as this mutual sharing continues we become good friends depending upon the kind of understanding we share. Strangers become the part of life, when the dear ones become strangers. I have felt this and may be now I don’t complain that I don’t have anyone who would understand me. Its just because I have been closely associated with many people through net.
Leave apart the self interests that keep me glued to the net. There have been many responsibilities which I have created for myself like managing different orkut communities, participation in different good communities, yahoo groups etc. There is nothing like a restriction for me to do all this. But this is what interests me. And I tell u there is a completely different identity which is very much different from which I have in real world. That’s not because I have kept all in some kind of illusion or I have not been myself. Its because I have been completely myself and I have done what I have wanted to do. I am not led by anyone’s directions and wish. Its wholly n solely me. The way I had been and I had wanted to be. But may b the days and the requirement of the circumstances had made me be a altogether different person. But thankfully I m now myself just for the reason that I have analyzed myself lot better n related to others too.

Thanks Babuni Bhai, Nitin, Aradhana, Neha, Priyanka, Pooja and Parul.
Thank You all for being there.

2 broke the Silence...wen wud U?: (+add yours?)

neha said...

why not a personal dairy but a blog?

cos u r not talking just to urself in ur posts, are u? the way "u" write, it is as if you're saying things to someone, who you assume will perfectly understand them. It's a way of communication, sometimes we talk to ourselves via saying things to others, and at times, it's the other way round. don't go deep into all these questions, might end up confusing you. do as you feel like doing. simple.

regarding net friends and real friends, trust me, there's a huge difference btwn the two. but again, much depends on one's luck and judgment regarding which kind of ppl you befriend.

in all situations, just stay composed.

and that's a lovely poem below. reminded me of my school and childhood days.

and classical music of course is brilliant. welcome back to Indian-ness :):)

KonUnDrumatEd said...

nice 2 c my name standin here!!