Lost and Alone

I m Lost....lost in what;which i even dont know.

I dont know why i dont feel like doing those things which i loved the most....music is no more playing in my player, riding my scooty is no more a great pleasure, sharing thoughts with my best friend was never tuff before as now.Living in an illusion n a shell n feeling like the smaller it is the better it is.But whats the illusion even i dont know.Running from the fact dat i m a failure perhaps.Where is dat positive skills n mind set now?Is it that i lack perseverance.Never loved silence.But thats what is making me feel better.

It was never one of my characteristics.May b this is what is called maturity.I know this isnt the case.But if at all this means maturity den i beg not to attain this.I was better what i was before.I have lost my words.I have changed.I know this was nt expected so soon but may b was necessary.

I m lonely though people are around me all d time.Feeling this in my guts as if i have nothing left in me.I know this hardly matters to anyone but still feeling to write it out here.

Dont know wht is it but wanna to be all alone
Alone under the dark sky,
as dark as the world to me now.

Alone with my soul in the eternal bliss
Bliss with the feeling of being an Unit
Not even the presence of my own self,
giving rise to a redundancy of that Ultimate Bliss!

Alone for all years to come
alone for i have chosen
Chosen to be Alone.

Alone to be only with my tears
Tears that were born only for me
not knowing why i need to be alone

But its the desire burning in me
to be alone so that the silence prevails
Silence that is only...
Only meant to be alone!